Carol Goyal Decodes Modern Love In India

In all its different forms – romantic, platonic, familial, spiritual and self — love remains one of the most profound human experiences, vital to personal growth. From the era of handwritten letters and postcards, to now instant messaging, the way we experience and express love has changed.

Rediffusion’s Bharat Lab, in partnership with Lucknow University, captures the shifting landscape of relationships in India. The book is a bilingual collection of first-hand narratives from young couples, enriched with verses from renowned poets, offering a rare blend of lived experience and literary reflection.

In an interview with ‘BrandSutra’, Carol Goyal, Executive Director at Rediffusion, reveals why some love stories remain untold and what the book hopes to offer.

Edited excerpts…

What are some of the unique features from these contemporary stories told? 

In these stories, it is important to note that with all the trauma of living in a fast-changing, complex world dominated by social media and technology, the emotion of love still endures and expresses itself in countless forms. The narratives reveal that the story of each love is unique even though they are of relatable, grounded characters who appear before us with all their little imperfections, their health issues, trauma, identity struggles and more. Some stories highlight personal growth, career ambitions and self-discovery more than just romantic fulfillment. They capture the full gamut of emotions linked to love, highlighting that though often blissful and inspiring, love can also bring sorrow and longing in its wake. Unlike the classic “happily ever after,” these love stories place authenticity over idealism.

2. Why, in your opinion, is it generally rarer to read women’s perspectives on love, compared to men’s? 

Historically, this can be attributed to the relative exclusion of women from public discourse, educational institutions, publishing industry, and other arenas where public expression was possible. Many women would use pseudonyms to express themselves in the male-dominated literary, philosophical and cultural spheres.  But this may no longer hold, as in this collection of stories, many women speak directly about their experiences about love, desire, heartbreak and intimacy, as they are doing increasingly elsewhere. Then again, women’s voices dominate in many folk songs and tales, where they articulate their points of view with greater freedom and abandon.

3. What is your favourite story from the book? Why?

It is difficult to choose one. Different stories stay with us because they create an impact through the interaction of a complex of factors, often combining emotional resonance, compelling narrative and characterisation, and personal relatability. The story that I recall immediately is ‘Phir Ek Baar, Pehla Pyaar’. It challenges the common belief that first love is uniquely special and forever treasured. It also questions widely accepted ideas about the “right” age for settling down, getting married, and the socially acceptable age gap between romantic partners. In the narrative, a man in his fifties finds himself falling for a woman twenty years younger. As he prepares for their date, he reflects on his past romantic relationships, recalling how each one, in its own way, carried the same thrill and intensity typically associated with a first love. 

4. Was there a reluctance in sharing stories from some of the people you approached? What were the reasons? 

There always are all kinds of people. Some are open, others are diffident. Those who are reluctant, hesitate to share their personal love experiences, struggles or even successes — for a variety of emotional, social and psychological reasons. They find revealing their innermost self often intimidating. They feel that telling them makes them vulnerable.  Others struggle to find the right words to express their intimate emotions or experiences. Then, there can be genuine apprehensions of present day relationships getting adversely impacted; and then, there always is the fear of judgment, of being criticised, misunderstood, or even being mocked. Recalling past loves can reopen emotional wounds, and lead to guilt and regrets, and sometimes people avoid sharing to protect those they once loved. So, reluctance can result from multiple sources depending on the cultural compass of the individual involved.

5. What impact do you hope this book will bring? 

We hope that the book will give readers a peep into how love, romance and marriage are getting re-shaped in an era where individuals are time-scarce, and old-world concepts like love letters are almost extinct, and romances are initiated and most times terminated on WhatsApp. The book, a culmination of over 18 months of hard work and research, also represents a rare collaboration between academia and the advertising industry, offering fresh insights for brands, researchers and general readers alike.

The book has been published as a bilingual to preserve the authenticity of narrations and so as also not to lose the flavour of what was being conveyed. The stories, both in English and Hindi, offer a glimpse into contemporary Indian society and its ongoing transformation – how relationships are getting ‘twined and untwined. And intertwined’.

We already have a lot of interest from many brands who want us to share our research and analysis on the new Bharat and its younger generation.

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